One of the unintended consequences of this blog is that people seek me out for advice.  Now, I’m not shy and I’m happy to tell you what I think…but at the same time, I just didn’t expect that.  And if people were seeking advice from me I would expect it to be in the work/life sphere.  How to get more flexibility at work, how to get more hands to help out at home, what is workplace flexibility and how can my company implement it.  And while that is the majority.  There is a strong minority, too…of job seekers.  Looking to learn how to do this whole job search thing in 2010.

For some of them it’s been a long time since they searched for a job, 20 years or more.  They were under the impression that work would always be there, because it always had been.  In many ways they are teaching me something.  After all I’ve had 7 jobs in 20 years partly due to the uncertain nature of the industry I used to be in and partly due to the fact that I enjoy change.  So to think of working for 1 or 2 companies in twenty-thirty years is a bit befuddling to me.  Almost as befuddling as how to handle being laid off is to the group of job seekers that ask advice from me.  Fortunately for them, I have a great network of people I know.  And one of that network is Paul Geffen, who found himself in their shoes just over 1 year ago.  For the first time in his adult life he was not working…and his journey over the past year is helpful to learn from.

Here is the gist:

Get started - some people just need a bit of a nudge to start.  Or a sympathetic ear.  And understand if you start and are unhappy, adjust your approach, change something and you just might find your niche.

Network, network, network - and while you want that network to be made up of people from your industry, cast a wider net, you’ll get a richer experience.

Know your story - of course you know your story but can you communicate it well.  I’m not a fan of the word “pitch” because for me networking is more about getting to know someone and having a conversation with them about mutual topics, not “pitching” them per se.  But I know Paul and he is a great networker as well – he’s not always pitching…he’s often listening and honing what he will say so when that right person comes along – he’s ready for them.

Keep busy – it may not be making you money, but keeping busy will keep you networking, could help build your skill sets and even bring you to new skill sets.  Paul did not do community building in his last gig…but he’s gotten pretty good at it and might even want to pursue it for his next gig.

Be ready to be surprised – whether it’s that you are enjoying your freedom more than you thought or than you feel you should admit, or it’s that you actually may no longer need that income as much as you thought or you didn’t really enjoy what your were doing anyway, you’d rather try something else.  Being unemployed is a journey.  Don’t script it.  Be ready to take what comes and investigate new opportunities and skills which just may take you somewhere wonderful.

Now of course you need to update your resume and have that ready and you need to talk to friends and colleagues and let them know that you are looking and what you are looking for, but the above tips will help you weather the storm.  And maybe even learn something about more flexibility at home and at work.  Paul certainly has.

For the first time in years my husband and I are enjoying an extended time together, on vacation, no kids.  And it’s great.  There’s no talk of who’s pulling their weight around the house.  No bickering over whose turn it is to be “on” parenting-wise.  Just getting back to remembering what we always liked about each other and still do.

As a parent, I knew this week would be great for us.  And I knew it would be great for my little one.  As an only child she is used to the adult world.  She is used to putting a toy down and having it unmolested when she gets back to it.  She is used to being the center of the universe with lots of adults rushing to her aid for the simplest thing.  Not this week.

She has been spending this week with cousins.  Ranging from teenagers to 1st graders and it is no longer all about her.  And from the reports I’m hearing she is loving her independence and taking to it well.  Doing things for herself that we typically help her with at home.  Learning give and take.  Asking questions when she’s unsure.  And gaining great self-confidence.

By letting go we are strengthening our marriage, and helping our little one learn and grow.  The lessons for this in the work/life struggle juggle is by giving up some control, we are all gaining much more.  So many parents and managers in the workplace focus on “control” and “trust.”   Instead I think they should lose control and presume trust and ability of kids/workers to do it themselves – there is more to be gained than they can possibly imagine.

A year and a half ago as I started this blog I considered the terms flexibility and balance in the work/life debate.

Now, I realize it’s more complicated than just being about those two words.  There is lots of confusion and debate about what is in your employer’s control and what is personal responsibility.  So here are my new thoughts on these two terms:

Workplace flexibility.  It’s important to workers.  Whether it be to sign kids up for school, to be sure houses are drying out properly post-flooding, to skip a harried commute, to continue working despite the weather gods, or because workers have more faith in themselves than in the employer contract…flexibility at work is yearned for more and more.

And obviously this plea is being heard.  You can’t ignore that something is afoot when the White House gets in on the conversation, when hourly workers are envied for their more flexible schedules and generous benefits or when there is general malaise about time spent at work and work interfering with other interests.

More work and less play makes for bad business. So workplace flexibility is an issue today and I do believe that is the right term.  And I hope to continue to see just a general overall flexible attitude to work.  Where getting the work done is more important than when, where & how it is done.  I mean c’mon, if hourly workers can have flexibility – what’s stopping the rest of the workforce?  One thing my be the misconception that everyone wants a flexible work arrangement – which is not a one-size-fits-all-solution easily implemented at companies.  It is a more individual discussion and decision and where an individual’s personal needs and responsibilities come in.

Work/life balance.  And here is where I think some people get mixed up on what is within the workplace’s control and what is not.  You see, if you are feeling a personal imbalance because your spouse travels and someone needs to be home, but your job requires that you travel…that is not for the workplace to solve.  That is for you and your spouse to solve.  You have agreed to do this job, the job requires travel, your spouse’s job requires travel…you need to work that out.  If work asks you to come back in when you are on your way home, and you agree to do so…you should not then complain about your lack of work/life balance.  You need to instead set boundaries and expectations.  If work gives you a smartphone and you are responding to emails 24/7 of your own volition or boredom…again not your workplace’s problem.  You need to decide what works for you and manage it.  It is not the responsibility of your workplace or HR to do that for you. (Somewhere I know Kris Dunn is smiling right now.)

My thinking has grown and expanded thanks to this wonderful community, thanks to some amazing people I’ve met, thanks to just listening and asking questions at networking events and of course due to my own journey through this maze of flexibility and balance and wanting it all.

What do you think? Is your work/life stress due to your employer & rules enforced by HR or because you want it all, all at once?

It’s that time for me again.  It’s much easier for me to stay inside with the air conditioner on so I can breathe.  But that’s just not practical…nor is it the right thing to do for those around me I care about.  For my little one, the weather has just turned warm and she wants to be outside running around, riding her bike, swinging on swings.  For me, exercise is a large part of helping me monitor and manage and see clearly my work/life fit.  And while my stairmaster and I are good friends…I’d rather be biking, running, walking outside.  So I could hibernate or I could suck it up and do the right thing…which is to venture out sneezing, watering eyes and all.

Recently at an HR conference a corporate HR friend told me that corporate America is “allergic to work/life balance.”  And that rings true to me.  They would rather hibernate and wait for the issue to go away.  Personally I don’t think this issue is going away any more than the seasonal allergies I have experienced since childhood are going away.

Thankfully not all corporations feel this way.  They are in the minority but they do exist and they do the right thing for those around them. Tomorrow I’ll be listening and learning and asking questions and hoping this conversation helps workplaces learn more about how important, effective and easy it is for them to stop being “allergic” to work/life issues.  Join us!

Fem 2.0 Blog Radio- Work/life Solutions for Hourly Workers

Recently, President Obama said that all workers need the flexibility to manage the demands of a job and home and kids. But often, work-life balance is seen as a luxury only for wealthy professionals. As of 2008 some 58% of all wage and salary workers in America were paid at hourly rates. But half of all workers don’t have a single paid sick day. It doesn’t have to be this way- and some companies are doing it right.

Join us on Tuesday, April 20 at 2PM EDT to discuss worklife solutions for hourly workers. Guests Carol Evans, CEO of Working Mother Media and Donna Klein, President & Founder of Corporate Voices for Working Families will discuss the upcoming “Best Companies for Hourly Workers” survey and will share why it’s so crucial for every American worker to have flexibility, no matter what their job is. They will also share best practices from companies that are figuring out how to accommodate hourly employees and flex.

Please join us and send in your questions ahead of time to events@workingmother.com

Tune into the radio show here!

I’ve talked a lot about how the world of work is broken and the relationship between employer and employee is sadly in need of a make over.  For some a make over may not be enough…they just need to strike out on their own.  Today’s guest blog post from Meghan M. Biro talks about being an entrepreneur.  They why’s, the how’s, the balance of it all.   And why that may be the most important decision you make in business – whether as an entrepreneur or employee.

People come to this blog to hear about the new normal, to get affirmation for their conviction that working in a cube in an atmosphere of distrust is not effective, and to think about ways in which to balance life and work so that no one gets short shrift.  When Leanne asked me to contribute my thoughts on why I chose to become an entrepreneur, it was obvious that this forum is a perfect place to have the discussion. So here goes.

There are many reasons to become an entrepreneur. Maybe that cube is just too small and confining. Maybe the sense that you’re not being treated as an adult, a trusted member of a team, has eroded your trust in the benefits of conventional employment. Or maybe you just always wanted to run your own business.

I chose the path of the entrepreneur because I wanted to make a difference in my work and in my life. I was pretty much born this way. I also wanted to manage my own company, and those who joined me in the enterprise, with work-life balance as a priority. To do that requires an appetite for risk and a commitment to quality. Keeping those forces in balance has occupied most of my time in the past 12 months.

Here are some of the things I’ve learned as an entrepreneur:

§   This life is not for everyone. The costs are not just fiscal but also emotional, and they are much higher than you can anticipate and plan for.

§   While start up costs are a huge issue, quality is equally important. If you can’t commit to running a quality business – putting the business, your clients’ and your employees’ interests ahead of yours on occasion – then find a way to achieve work-life balance while working for someone else.

§   Know what work-life balance means to you. Is it time to exercise? dance? read? Time with the kids? Dinner with the whole family? These are all qualitative, not quantitative, components of work-life balance. Focus on quality and you’re on the way to work-life balance, whether you are an entrepreneur or an employee.

§   If you’ve decided you aren’t a natural entrepreneur, no harm/no foul. Refocus and look for employers with a business model that focuses on quality over quantity.

§   If you decide to be an entrepreneur, be prepared to be alone a lot of the time. You have made a choice to lead, not follow, which means you will be in front of the organization, on an uncharted path, most of the time. Find your peace in knowing you are the guide.

Work-life balance comes to us when we seek it, when we insist on it. You don’t need to be an entrepreneur to find it – you just have to be really sure about what matters most to you.

Celebrate your choices. Commit to quality. Seek balance. Rinse, repeat, and tell us how things worked out for you.

Meghan M. Biro is the founder of TalentCulture a career, branding, and  new media consulting firm focused on connecting the right people with  the right organizational culture. TalentCulture is a diverse social  community that engages in creating and sharing the latest perspectives on finding meaningful careers and using them to grow. They are focused on building a culture of innovation, awareness and understanding.  Meghan believes strongly that culture is very much a part of our careers and vice versa and included in that culture is the work/life struggle and juggle.

Now that the euphoria has worn off a bit from last week’s historic summit at the White House on workplace flexibility, it’s time to get back to work. I was very excited about lots of what I heard. But one of the subjects I am passionate about and think is the key to making work work for all…having hourly workers have more autonomy over their time.

And that was talked about in one of the break out sessions…a lot. And the discussion was enlightening. Some in the room admitted that they never would have been able to figure out how to be more flexible for this group of employees by management dictating policies. The good news. The employees understood what was needed both for themselves and for the company to succeed and they figured it out!

Wow. How’s that for trusting your employees, asking for their help and working together to solve a problem? Adults at work…very nice. And adults who are now engaged in a process that leads to better retention, customer service and bottom line results.

What were some of their secrets?

A contingent/temporary workforce standing by to specifically step in for coverage as needed. What a great way to keep those who sort of want to retire or step off the treadmill…but sort of want to work…working. Much like substitute teachers. They get called as needed. They come in if they can.

Ability for shift workers to trade hours as needed with others. Whether this is through a formal software program or a more informal “I’ll cover for you another day if you can help me out today” sort of thing it’s working.

Listening to workers, trusting that they are inherently good and want to help the company succeed, and understanding that life cannot stop just because a shift has begun.

It seems easy enough. But there are many naysayers. And plenty who think this is more of a perk for professionals than an imperative for all workers. Which is why I’m thrilled to be working with Working Mother Media to help get the word out about their upcoming Forum on Hourly Workers where they will announce the list of Top Companies for Hourly Workers and highlight some of the best practices from that group. I don’t know if what I heard during the White House forum will dovetail with these best practices but I can’t wait to learn more.

Especially as many believe it’s too tall an order for shift/hourly workers to be able to get flexibility at work. There are 75 million hourly workers in America and as a popular HR blogger told me recently it simply comes down to either your company values its hourly workforce or it doesn’t. Those that don’t will pay…in turnover and customer satisfaction and ultimately success.

Can the hourly workforce get flexibility? And who are some of the companies we may see on this list come May 4th? I truly do not know the answers, yet. I very much look forward to finding them out.

Finally in honor of Gary Vaynerchuk’s recent announcement that he is re-evaluating his work/work balance, I have two signed copies of “Crush It” to give away to those who comment on this blog post, tweet it out @leanneclc or join the discussion at the CareerLifeConnection.com facebook page.

This weekend and next week I am very excited to be talking to so many of the audiences I serve at Career Life Connection.  Since work/life is so multi-layered I wear many hats.  I help people with their own personal responsibility on work/life struggles.  I talk to those working in the corporate world or those that want to return to it to help them engage management on how they can work more flexibly and help it increase its bottom line.  I talk to corporate recruiters and HR people who are key to understanding that work/life is tied to productivity, talent attraction and employee retention and is thus a pain point for corporate executives.

What I haven’t been able to do is get them to talk with each other. To understand how much common ground they all have and how flexibility at work can help them all achieve their various goals.  Enough with the echo chambers and back slapping both audiences get from their peers.  It’s time to start understanding the other side…seek common ground…and find success.  I’m keeping my fingers crossed.

And if you’re at SXSW or ERE Expo in the next week and want to discuss, debate, give me a piece of your mind.  I’m game.  Comment on this post, @leanneclc or  email chase at careerlifeconnection dot com.

Don’t you hate it when you have a really great presentation, conversation, brainstorming session and then 20 minutes later you have an epiphany that would have been perfect if only you’d had it during the event?  Yeah, me too.  Yesterday in fact.

I was on a call with community managers through The Community Roundtable and we were discussing work/life.  I was giving them the knowledge I had learned over the years and through the research I’ve done for this site:

1) Have boundaries and stick to them

2) Manage expectations

3) You cannot have it all, all at once – you will need to say “no” to things

4) Ask for help

By all accounts the call went well and a good time was had by all and I learned a lot from them.  Afterward I was talking offline with one of the participants.  He is an expectant father and is nervous about how his life will be changing soon and how he will manage his work/life.   I told him that this would all actually become much easier…because as a parent you need to do all of the above…regularly.

There it was…the epiphany that has probably been rolling around in my head for a while but just simply couldn’t manage to come out at the opportune time.

Why has it been rolling around…well this is a daily routine with me:

1) Boundaries – while I like snuggling with my little one, I also like sleep.  My pre-schooler knows mommy & daddy’s room is off limits to kids before 7am unless you are sick/in need.  It’s a hard and fast rule.  And it works really well – with the help of a digital clock.

2) Expectations – “Mommy can I have a cookie?”  “Mommy can I have an ice cream?” “Mommy can I have that toy?” How many times a day, week, month, year do I hear this?  While I am asked constantly for these things she doesn’t get them consistently.  New toys come around birthdays & holidays, treats come sparingly each day.  That is what she now knows to expect.  It won’t stop her from asking but it stops her from having a meltdown each time she doesn’t get what she has asked for.

3) Say “no” – well based on the above I say “no” a lot.  But I also do it in a more positive way.  “Mommy can I have a cookie?” “Absolutely, once we have dinner.”  “Mommy can I have a new toy?” “Not right now, but let’s put it on your birthday list.”

4) Help – There is no way I could do all of this and stay sane without my nanny, weekend babysitter, husband, extended family.  I would simply be too stressed and dysfunctional.

What happens if I don’t use these 4 constantly?  Bedlam, unhappiness, stress, tears for all.

So why wouldn’t that be true for our adult selves as well?  It doesn’t matter if you’re a community manager or a business owner or a car mechanic.  It doesn’t matter if you use a smart phone or not.  It doesn’t matter if you’re 20, 30, 40 or 80.  This is what is needed.  And I’ll be the first to admit – I’m great at parenting a pre-schooler.  Not so much at parenting myself  – because it’s not fun…and I do want it all, NOW…and let’s be honest my parents would never let me stay up this late to write a blog post.

So show of hands…who wants to be my parent?

Last week I wrote a Worker’s Bill of Rights. And I’m sticking to it.  I think these are common sense rights that actually do not cost companies money but strengthen the employee/employer relationship, increase productivity and the bottom line.  To that end I think employees need to understand that while these rights may be “self-evident” they are not without obligations and responsibilities.

So here is the corporate side of things.  A pledge of allegiance to the company you are working for currently.  It is not one that is binding forever.  But if you are expecting them to treat you as an adult…you need to be an adult.  So here is what I propose the pledge to include:

We pledge to do our work well and turn it in on time

We pledge to act like adults when representing our employers

We pledge to be available when we say we will

We pledge to be flexible if we are needed extra now and then as they pledge to be flexible in slow times with giving us back some of that extra

We pledge not to abuse sick, vacation, disability policies

We pledge to work as members of a team, no matter where we physically work

We pledge to be productive employees that enhance the company’s bottom line

We pledge to discuss any complaints we may have with the company first before airing them out publicly

We pledge to treat other employees, customers, bosses as we would like to be treated

Simple enough, right?  That’s what I think.  Again feel free to add to this pledge, complain about it, berate it.  But let’s get the conversation going and hopefully we can get flexibility at work flowing!

This will be a rant…yep a real, honest to goodness, can’t stop myself, toddler temper tantrum rant.

Workers of the world unite!  Unite and get the sort of flexibility you want in the workplace.  That is the ONLY way it will happen.  That means all generations, all genders, all races, all religions, those with children, those without children, those with grandchildren, and so on, and so on and so on.  Stop separating yourselves to advance your particular agenda at the expense of the whole.

What on earth am I talking about?

Well let’s see, there are women who are being slighted constantly.  Older workers who need to start a revolution.  Families who just can’t make work work. Younger workers who are misunderstood.   Then there was this podcast series that separated everyone from moms to dads to Latinos to seniors to…well everyone.

There are movements and conferences and isms that continually pit workers against one another.  And you know what, it’s working…the corporate work world isn’t really changing…instead they’re watching workers duke it out with each other for more attention to their particular segment of the population.

I have an idea.  How about instead we talk about the similarities in what we all seek and we work together to make it happen?  I know…crazy…right? Here goes:

We the People of the World of Work, in Order to form a more perfect Workplace, establish Justice, insure business productivity and growth, provide for ourselves, promote the general Welfare, and secure the Blessings of Liberty to ourselves and our Posterity, do ordain and establish this Constitution for the World of Work.

Workers Bill of Rights:

Autonomy over our schedules – whether we work hourly or are on salary

Freedom to work where and how we want as long the job gets done

Right to be treated like the adults we are

Right to have outside interests and take time for those regardless of what time of day they occur

Ability to work at the level we’ve achieved and be compensated accordingly even if we work less than 40 hours/week

Right to receive raises, promotions, and bonuses based on the merit of our work instead of on the amount of face time put in at the office

Right to ask for more flexibility at work without being discriminated against

Right to work without discrimination when we have children, have reached retirement age, are just out of college, or need to care for sick loved ones

Right to fall ill and not be financially penalized or fear for our jobs

Right to take time off for ourselves that we have earned and not be categorized as “shirkers”

This is not dictatorship but a democracy so please feel free to propose your own amendments.  I don’t think these are unreasonable…but I do think that unless we ALL work together this World of Work Constitution and Workers Bill of Rights will never be realized.