I remember being very little and my grandparents retired to New Hampshire.  Of course I didn’t know what that meant.  I knew it meant they lived far away (3 1/2 hours by car back then), I knew it meant that anytime I was there they had lots of time with me, I grew to learn that my grandfather who had been a photographer most of his working life, was now a ski lift operator at Cannon Mountain.  That’s what I thought retirement meant.

Until 7 years later when the massive amounts of snow got to them and they re-retired to Florida and my free ski house disappeared.

Apparently my grandfather was way ahead of his time.  In the late 1960′s and in his 60′s he decided there was no way he wanted to sit around in retirement.  He got a “retirement job.”  A term that started around 2005 as the Baby Boomers began to reach retirement age.  What is a retirement job?  It’s one that is often fewer hours and most definitely less hassles & less political than that one you had previously.  Often you get to do the stuff you like and not the stuff you don’t like.  And should it get to be a hassle…you can walk away.  Because believe it or not…most who are working retirement jobs, do not need the money.  They like the cushion, but they are working for the social aspects and the boost it gives their self esteem.  A new report just out by the Families and Work Institute in conjunction with the Boston College Sloan Center on Aging and Work highlights this trend.

Just look at the numbers:

• 20% of those 50+ have retirement jobs

• 75% expect they will have a retirement job in the future

• 31% say they are working to stave off boredom and 18% want to feel productive and useful

• Only 18% said they were working because income from other sources was not enough

This is just one more example of how the workforce is changing and why the way work works need to change with it.  We are no longer a society who works just to pay the bills.  We are a society that gets satisfaction and enjoyment from work.  And when those two factors intersect you get a workforce who chooses their employer and walks away from those employers that do not fit them.  Which probably explains why we also hear so much about employer brand and employers of choice these days.

Listen up employers…from the top to the bottom your workforce is becoming choosy.  And we are working longer and on our terms, and we are thinking more about how work fits in with the rest of our lives.  My grandfather was way ahead of his time with his retirement job.  But honestly I don’t see myself ever retiring, although I’m not sure I see myself ever again working full-tilt, full-time, with all the stress that goes with that.  Perhaps, I’ve already found my “retirement job” – in my 40′s.

Full disclosure  – I was hired as a consultant to help get the word out about the study to other bloggers in a press call by Families & Work Institute & Boston College and as this report is important to my audience decided to write about it here, myself.

For more coverage check out this morning’s Morning Edition on NPR

That title is taken from the show Two and Half Men – mostly because it was what ran through my head most as I noodled on this blog post.  Which does not help with the writers’ block at all

Here’s why I think this song kept running through my head.  Because it seems to me women do and men promote what they’ve done, they promote themselves, their good deeds, their hard work, everything and anything.  And for some reason women just do it….and then move on and do something else.  Gross generalizations I realize but that doesn’t mean it’s not true.

I was fortunate enough to attend the Boston College Center for Work and Families 20th anniversary celebration last week.  And really liked the way the morning’s content was presented.  The title was Next Generation Work-Life: Celebrating our history, envisioning our future

The talk all morning was about how juggling work & family and being more available for your family is a leadership skill.  Not just at home, but also in the world of work.  And I wonder if the focus hadn’t been on men this time, if that would have held true.

The thought process is if  you are happy at home you will be more productive at work.  If you feel productive and valued at work, you won’t suffer from “kick the dog” syndrome and come home and well…kick the dog.  So it turns out work/life isn’t about feeling balanced, or easing stress or getting 28 hours of tasks done in a 24 hour day.  It’s about leadership.

This is the first time I’ve heard the work/life debate in this context, although it seems clear Steven Poelmans has been saying this for far longer than I’ve been listening clearly.

That session was followed by a panel of working fathers…yes, working fathers.  Whose spouses are working mothers and everyone needs to pitch in at home to make it all work.  At least that’s what all of these men realized as they navigated their way through dating, proposal, marriage and family planning.  I’m pretty sure not one of them would have come to this on their own.  But they have smart wives who communicate clearly and they communicated clearly…clearly.

Kudos to Boston College for putting on an agenda that focused on something other than work/life being a mommy, female, women’s issue.  We’ve come pretty far since the time when child rearing was clearly in the realm of the mom.

Many thanks to Dan Mulhern for heading the panel.  It was wonderful to hear his tales of how he first learned he may play a supporting role in the family (in pre-cana class) to anecdotes of how far men have come.  He talked about how he used to be the only man at the playground and wasn’t really sure where to stand or what to say when he first started taking on the “go-to-parent” role in the family.  Fast forward to today when he is far from the only Dad at the playground where men make playdates for their kids to head to the playground with other Dads whose company they enjoy.

It’s great to hear the remember whens but I also think the evidence that Dads have an increasing role in our work/life are everywhere:

More Dads at school drop off & pick up (less for regular schedule pick up – but plenty at afterschool programs)

More Dads actively involved in school on PTAs & parents committees

More Dads at the playground

More Dads at the Pediatrician’s and Dentist’s offices

More Dads making playdates with me & my little one

The other exciting part of this celebration was not just men taking time out from their career to discuss this.  The number of companies who sent HR people who focus on work/life issues to this conference.  To listen, to learn and to share with each other.  Interestingly, during the men’s panel most of the questions were not HR focused…but personally focused.  So for those of you who don’t believe it…HR people are real people too, with the same struggles & juggles as the rest of us.

The day showed what great progress has been made even in the past two years, since I’ve started this site.  But yes, we still do have a long ways to go.  And we can learn much from each other.  Women – promote yourself & your skills more.  Still keep getting it done – but then tell someone you got it done and communicate clearly with your spouse.  You are a leader both at work and at home!  And men – let’s not kid ourselves…you’ve come a long way, but you’re no where near 50-50 in the parenting, housework, home organization realm.  While you deserve a pat on the back…don’t let it go to your head…get back and just do it.  Because there’s always more to do.

I’ve written here before about how I don’t know how anyone can go through some of what life throws our way without a supportive workplace.  I’ve been there with my Dad and with my little one.  In both cases we had great health care plans to fall back on and my husband and I had workplaces who got it.

I’m very excited for health care reform simply because I live in Massachusetts where we passed reform years ago.  But I’m also just like you – wondering how it will affect me & my coverage and my workplace.  As I work with many HR folks and I know this is a hot topic.  I also know companies like to pay attention to their bottom lines, even if it they are rolling in it.  I’m wondering what will happen during the upcoming changes in the health care system.  And to that end I’m moderating a series of webinars on this topic.  The first one comes this Wednesday.  Please sign up if you are interested.  If you have questions on the topic, please feel free to submit them here, by emailing me at webinar at careerlifeconnection dot com or on twitter to @leanneclc.

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6 Months On Are Human Resources Departments Ready for Reform?

Date: Wednesday, September 22

Time: 11:00am Eastern

Reserve your webinar seat now, space is limited

It’s been six months since healthcare reform passed the legislature.  At the time and since there have been lots of questions about how the new law will affect employee benefits, employers’ bottom lines, and employee recruiting/retention.  Join Michal Kisilevitz of the Corporate Executive Board’s Corporate Leadership Council who will provide insight into how companies are doing preparing for the Jan. 2011 start, what is still foremost in their minds, and what information their C-Suite is looking to them for.  This webinar will be moderated by Leanne Chase of CareerLifeConnection.com and feature:

·     Poll data from CEB member companies

·     What does/does not happen starting Jan. 2011

·     Frequently asked questions from HR about Reform

·     Where to get the answers & help if your HR Dept. is not prepared

Register Now

Michal Kisilevitz is the Managing Director of the Corporate Leadership Council Benefits (CLC Benefits) and the Corporate Leadership Council Compensation (CLC Compensation) at the Corporate Executive Board.  In this role she maintains overall leadership responsibility for the strategy, business operations, product development, and client service delivery for both programs.  Michal also manages the executive education and executive advisory services for all Corporate Leadership Council programs.

Prior to joining the Corporate Executive Board in 2004 Michal was an Associate Principal at McKinsey and Company and a leader in its Global Organization Practice.  While at McKinsey she served institutions in a variety of industries, including financial services, health care, consumer packaged goods, industrial, and telecommunications, and on a variety of strategic and organizational topics.  In particular she worked with clients on talent issues, performance management, and change management programs.

Michal received her MBA from the Wharton School of the University of Pennsylvania.

The Corporate Executive Board enables superior business outcomes by delivering authoritative data and tools, best practice research, and peer insight to the leaders of the world’s great enterprises.

With more than 300,000 corporate best practices, 1,500 benchmarking datasets, and 11,500 analytical tools, all powered by the world’s preeminent executive network, the Corporate Executive Board serves senior-most executives across the Human Resources, Legal, Finance, Information Technology, and Sales and Marketing functions, their management teams, and their professional staffs within the world’s top corporations, financial services institutions, government agencies, and not-for-profit organizations.

Founded in 1983, the Corporate Executive Board is headquartered in Washington, D.C. Our 1,700 staff, located around the world, directly serves over 200,000 business leaders, in more than 4,800 of the world’s best companies.

Last night I was catching up on some TV viewing and watched the “Last Woman Standing” episode of The Closer.  In the episode the lead character (Brenda) is up for Chief of Police of Los Angeles.  Why is she up for Chief of Police?  Because she’s good at her job and because she’s a she.  In previous episodes we learned that Brenda never really was considering applying for that job, that she wasn’t sure she wanted the job, that she likes her current role and last night I learned that she doesn’t really want the job.

So simple conundrum, right? Just pass on the opportunity.  No worries.  Others certainly want it.

Except that she’s a she.  And she would be the first female police chief.  Breaking barriers for others, being a role model and all that.   What I found most interesting watching last night was the generation gap that I saw portrayed.  Brenda’s mentor in this process is a boomer – who would love to become chief but she’s never been asked.  However, she has been asked to strong arm Brenda to apply and help her through the process.    Brenda is Generation X.  And while she understands that it would be momentous for her to become Chief.  She’s also not sure she wants to or that she will like the job.  In fact she’s pretty sure it’s a mis-match.

But so far she’s forging ahead and meeting with the Mayor.  Everyone behind her is cheering her on…but she just doesn’t feel so cheery.

Anyone relate?  Yeah, me too.

We are women, so we need to open the doors for more women like those who came before us, right?  Umm I’m not so sure anymore.   Should anyone take a job because of social expectations even if it’s not one they want?  HR people talk about employee engagement a lot these days.  I’m pretty sure liking the job is a big part in successful employee engagement which leads to higher productivity and employee retention.

But back to the generational divide. I think many Boomers would say:

1) Yes – break those barriers, you go girl

2) Of course – it’s a promotion – more responsibility, more money, more power, more, more, more  – that is the American Way

And I, a Gen Xer think:

1) If you want to break barriers you absolutely should be allowed to do so, if not…don’t.

2) Money & power do not equal happiness and you only need so much of both.  Sometimes less is more.  Oh, and I’d rather like my job than be at the top and hate it.

These are some of the reasons I believe the world of work is changing.

Perhaps I’m generalizing a bit too much.  But I don’t think so.  You?

I’ve been reading and am interested in the proposed legislation in New York that would give Nannies a Worker’s Bill of Rights both because I write about workplace conditions here and because I employ a Nanny. While  I do not live in New York so the legislation would not affect me, I certainly have an opinion.  But honestly we’ve heard from the bloggers, the journalists, and the moms on the issue but we have not heard much from those that it is proposed to help….the Nanny community.

So I asked my Nanny what she thought, which seemed a sensible thing to do.

Here are her details:

Juliette
30
Born & raised in the US
Professional Nanny – meaning this is what she does & wants to do for a living. Her mother & sister are also professional nannies
Some college education but college was not for her
Bright and capable
Has been in our employ 4 1/2 years

Me:  What do you think of the proposal that Nannies who work more than an 8 hour day get paid overtime – meaning time & a half?

Juliette:  (after thinking about it) I think it should be between the employer & employee to decide that.  For instance I worked for 1 family that asked if I minded working 50 hours/week.  I was happy to, and liked the extra pay.  If they had had to pay me time and half I’m not sure they would have offered me the extra work.

Juliette:  Also – what about how I used to work for you 4 days a week for 10 hours a day.  I really liked that schedule, it gave me Fridays off and I got to sleep in.  Would you have to pay me overtime even if I only worked 40 hours?

Me:  It appears that way.

Juliette:  That stinks for me (pause) and for you.

Juliette:  And what about weeks you go away?  If I was scheduled for 50 hours and you went away, would you still have to pay me overtime even though I didn’t really work that week? ==== (My family travels a lot!)

Me:  I don’t know.

Me:  Also the law would give Nannies paid vacation & sick time.

Juliette:  I already get that.

Me:  It would also mandate that I give you two weeks’ notice before firing you.

Juliette: Well, you just gave me 3 months’ notice that you could only keep me on part-time and then helped me find another family to fill in the gap.  (Long, long pause) So I don’t think I really care about this law.

Me: Yeah.

There are a million different scenarios for how nannies work and are paid in this country.  And I completely understand that workers now as in the past sometimes need protection.  But I fear the ones who need it will not get it with this law.  Juliette is an intelligent, strong-willed worker who interviewed us 4 1/2 years ago as rigorously as we interviewed her.  She does not need this law.  If she felt she was being taken advantage first she would speak up for herself and if that didn’t work she would simply find another job.  And I fear those that do need this law are mostly not in this country legally and will never complain.

I wish those who employ anyone – domestic workers, line workers, laborers, knowledge workers – would just treat others as they would like to be treated as an employee:

• Give a specific job description including what is expected during work hours and stick to it or amend it.
• Pay a fair wage.
• Vacation and sick time are part of a healthy workforce and should be paid.
• Reward good behavior.
• Punish bad behavior.
• Communicate early and often if problems/concerns arise.
• Understand those you employ do have lives outside of work and be flexible when needed.
• Do not take advantage of any worker.
• Employee US citizens or those with green cards eligible to work in this country.
• Give appropriate and honest notice of changes to work status – like reduced hours, lay offs, etc.

Any questions?

Two nights ago my little one and I were reading bedtime stories and she said “Anyhow, Mommmy, what the Hell is that?”  And I did just what most Moms I know do.  I said “Oh, honey we don’t use that word…it’s not a nice word.”  Now clearly we do use that word or she would not have.  After all kids are great at imitating what they see at home.  She then asked, “Why is it a bad word?”  And honestly I could not come up with an answer to that.

I’ve never been one for organized religion and I never really bought in to the whole Heaven and Hell concept.  I’m more of a John Lennon “Imagine” kind of thinker:  “…no Hell below us, above us only sky.”  And if you were on social media last week you would have seen this venn diagram and this chart to provide some fun entertainment.

I believe more in Karma…you reap what you sow.  If you are not nice to people and treat them poorly – sooner or later you will do so to the wrong person or to too many people and bam…Karma will get you.  That I think is a better lesson to teach than that Hell is a bad word…and a lesson that perhaps should have been taught to more C-levels and managers in the workplace.

You see in good times & bad companies have increased CEO pay, increased profits, while decreasing raises and benefits…but there was one thing they did increase…everyone’s workload.  They are thrilled the recession has come along as it makes good sense to act this way, now.  But as some reports by SHRM and by The Conference Board have indicated, this behavior started long before the recession.  The recession has just kept workers from reacting to it.  We’re starting to see some action on this front. And I, for one, am curious to see where it all will come out, after all you catch more (fire) flies with honey than vinegar.

I’m betting on Karma.  To hell with Hell.

I will never forget an experience I had while living in Utah.  For some reason a ski mountain was giving away a day free to residents – I think it was before the Olympics and they were showing off the venue ahead of the games.  Whatever the reason there was a coupon, you printed it out and you presented it at the ticket window.  As my husband and I like to ski, we partook.  When we got to the mountain there was 1 very long line.  I got in line while he took the coupons to see if we were in the right place.  Well we were and we weren’t.  There were 7 ticket windows…7!  And 3 of them were around the corner from the line with workers at the ready.  What happened was people just lined up behind the person in front of them without asking any questions…total sheep.

Now could the mountain have done a better job directing people that day?  Sure.  But could the people have done a better job taking responsibility for themselves?  Oh my goodness, yes!

And I think this may be why Human Resources departments and I don’t get along.  I am not and never have been a sheep.  And HR is often put in the position to enforce rules that I simply don’t get…like:

The workday ends at 5p:  At one company I worked for the HR guy would patrol the door between 4 and 5 and would call you out if you tried to leave before 5.  There was no consideration of whether your work for the day was done, no consideration of what you may have going on personally, there was just a rule.  I skirted it by taking long lunches on slow days to attend to personal needs…he didn’t patrol the door at the lunch hour.

Work is during the day…part-time school is at night:  Nope – I went to a graduate school that did not have part-time options.  So there were 1-4p classes and I was in them.  I bypassed HR and made a deal with my manager.  We’d go over my schedule each semester and we’d arrange for it to work.  Now the most befuddling thing about this one is that my employer who was making the rules…was also the graduate school I was attending and a benefit they they used to attract talent was tuition reimbursement!  The part of the University I worked for was very far removed from the actual day-to-day of University life, but still, how could I take advantage of the tuition benefit if I couldn’t complete a degree at night?!  Not to mention, by completing it at their school – the benefit money went right back in their pockets…befuddling.

New hires get 2-weeks vacation…unless they are upper management:  Ummm….no.  The person trying to hire me and my 15 years of experience understood why this was a ridiculous rule.  She went to HR – their hands were tied.  Hers were not.  Our deal was that I took as much vacation as needed.  We just didn’t always fill out the paperwork correctly for HR.  Now of course this can bite you if your manager leaves, and that happened here.  I had 5 managers in 3 years.  But I managed to work around the rule with all of them – as I made myself more valuable to them, than they were to me.

You can’t work part-time and also telecommute 1 day – Except I did…for 2 years…very successfully, until my employer tightened their grip on telecommuters because 1 of the many behaved badly.  Instead of firing that 1 individual, they took telecommuting off the table.  (Even though the CEO telecommuted from another country!) I took my skills off the table and moved on with my career.

And apparently being a sheep can get you killed crossing the street.  Which makes Bostonians who jaywalk constantly feel like geniuses.  Okay, we may not be geniuses but we are definitely not sheep.  Here’s hoping HR can learn how to stave off herd mentality and if not here’s hoping workers teach them how it’s done.

I’ve been following the build up, the actual convention and the aftermath of the Society of Human Resources Management’s (SHRM) recent annual convention.  I’m a skeptic.  You see a professional association that makes its money on certifying practitioners so they are well equipped to prevent lawsuits and fines for those that hire them, but does not teach the skills to actually help solve HR problems in the workplace is not exactly my cup of tea.  SHRM is not known for being cutting edge or out-of-the-box thinkers.  But this year some of the usual naysayers were not naysaying as much.  So I got a little sucked in.

Forget that China Gorman, a great listener and thinker had recently left her COO post.  Forget the fact that I don’t believe any convention can serve the needs of 11,000 people well.  Forget the fact that I just don’t get why SHRM exists – except to dole out PHR (Professional in Human Resources) and SPHR (yep – you guessed it, Senior Professional in Human Resources) certifications.  I  forgot all those facts and got sucked in by the Monster crew, the SHRM blogging group, SHRM’s new Social Media guy and my friends in the biz who attended and tweeted and blogged and vlogged from the conference.  Until…

This tweet:

@SHRM Check out the new #SHRM10 blog posts on Lebron James and celebrity approach to the worklife balance http://annual.shrm.org/blog

Seriously?!  SHRM’s having an actual conversation about work/life and blogging about it…excellent.  Cali Yost has been trying to get them to focus on and be advocates for work/life change in the corporate sphere for years.  And after last year’s SHRM conference where Jack Welch told the audience “There is no such thing as work/life balance” (for women) perhaps they learned a thing or two.

OR NOT.

I clicked the link, then I started watching the videos.  And I was stunned.   As I’m not sure what celebrities are supposed to teach us about work/life realities.  Maybe SHRM was trying for the US Magazine slant “Celebrities they’re just like us?”  Yeah, right!

• They have more people to do things than most can dream of.  Have a meeting but your kid gets sick at school?   They’ve got people.  Family coming to town and you need to clean your house & pick them up from the airport & put in a full day’s work?  They’ve got people.

• Celebrities don’t report to HR or a manager so they won’t lose their job by saying “no” to mandatory overtime on the day they need to show up in person to sign their kids up for school.

• They get paid a lot when they get paid…nope, they don’t have paid sick days…but I’m guessing it’s not a problem…they can just reschedule that show for a later date.  After all the promoter already has their fans money and has been holding it for a number of months.

• They don’t work like most of us…regularly. They have spurts where they are super busy and then long stretches where they have down time.  It’s not a M-F 9 to 5 existence – which is part of why real work/life is such a struggle.  Those are the only hours to do things like go to the Dr, have the cable company come in, see a plumber without a weekend rate surcharge.  Oh and did I mention…these people have people to help with all that!

Dear SHRM, you just had 11,000 actual hard-working professionals in one place.  Some of them have childcare issues, some have elder care issues, some have passions for art, music, etc., some just want more time for themselves.  And they gathered in San Diego – having to arrange to be away from their responsibilities during the week of your conference.  They are juggling meetings virtually, checking in with babysitters, leaving lists for their spouses and co-workers to take on extra duties.  Why on earth did you not interview them?!  Then perhaps there could have had a real discussion about work/life with HR professionals from a personal and a professional perspective.   We may have even learned a few tips & tricks that we all could benefit from.

Truly SHRM, I am once again befuddled.  For two years running your conference has had a work/life angle…just not a very  insightful or useful one.

I know many of us moms feel like our husbands aren’t quite always pulling enough weight around the house.  In fact, I think many husbands even understand and secretly acknowledge this.  But let’s celebrate how far we’ve come…

When I was a kid Father’s day included a tie, a wallet, a badly crafted ashtray from school or some present of that nature.  Then Dad hung out in the den to watch sports or headed to the golf course.  Today’s Dad is different.  My husband and most of my friends husband’s see Father’s Day as a day to ensure they spend quality time with their kids.  This can be seen through some of the gifts my friends kids will be giving their Dads on Sunday:

This is not your father’s Father’s day.  This is a new era. One where Dads find bringing up the kids to be satisfying, enjoyable and part of their jobs.  More evidence of the modern Dad emerge in the Boston College Center for Work & Family’s new study “The New Dad:  Exploring Fatherhood Within a Career Context.”  Like other studies this one highlights the changing demographics of our society:  more women are in the workforce, more women are getting advanced degrees, the rise of the dual career family.  But instead of studying it from a woman’s point of view, this study looks at if from a man’s point of view.  And it points out that more of these men are now feeling work/life conflict than their partners (men = 58% women = 45%).  And these guys are working on it.  In their own words this study explores:

When my first child was born, I was working at the law firm and there’s always an aspiration of becoming partner and the expectation of having to bring in the business, do a lot of travel…With my new job and the second child, if I was never to advance a whole lot career wise, I’d be happy because the work is good, the money is good and you know, the family is happy.” [Matt, age 37]

And I have some of my own evidence.  Recently as my extended family was gathered together for a long weekend I learned about two Dads who made interesting career decisions.  Ones that I’m sure our Fathers’ generation would find befuddling.

Dad #1 – was out of work last year and recently got some contract work at a company he had worked for previously.  He loves the work, he does a great job, but it is uncertain as it’s contract work.  After a few months the company asks Dad #1 to come on full-time.  They are thrilled with his work and want him to join them.  While he is honored and his financial life would be rosier with the job, he refuses.  It’s not the work, it’s the company culture.  He’s worked there before, he’s seen those he works with now have conflict, it’s not a very family-friendly place.  So Dad #1 explains that he’s flattered but he’d much rather continue with the arrangement they currently have.  What he doesn’t say is that he likes being home for dinner with his family, attending events his kids are part of both during the work day and after, and he even was able to drive my family to the airport and say goodbye to us during the work day.  (Thanks!)

Dad #2 – Is a consultant for a company.  He has completed a recent project and now the company wants him to replicate that project in many cities.  He’s all for it.  In February he tells the company he’s ready to get started…he urges them to move forward.  They hold meetings, they delay and now it’s June.  They’re ready for him.  He reminds them what he told them when he took the consulting gig – June-August are a travel-free zone for him.  That is when his kids are out of school for the summer and free of sports and extra-curricular activities.  He wants to maximize his time with them and their backyard pool.  He’s sorry but if they want to do this project right now…they’ve got the wrong guy.  If they can hold off until September he’d be happy to help out.

And finally an example on how Dad’s are changed from today.  My husband is still the primary breadwinner so it is understood that I take on more of the childcare duties.  That is our dual-career family agreement.  This morning he is on deadline.  So I did what needed doing: getting our little one up, dressed and off to school.  When I returned from doing so he thanked me.  I’m pretty sure I never heard my Dad thank my Mom for getting us up and off to school!  It’s a new era for Dads and work/life that I’m thrilled to celebrate this weekend.

How about you?  Do you see changes in the way Dads are dads or the way they too struggle/juggle it all?

One of the unintended consequences of this blog is that people seek me out for advice.  Now, I’m not shy and I’m happy to tell you what I think…but at the same time, I just didn’t expect that.  And if people were seeking advice from me I would expect it to be in the work/life sphere.  How to get more flexibility at work, how to get more hands to help out at home, what is workplace flexibility and how can my company implement it.  And while that is the majority.  There is a strong minority, too…of job seekers.  Looking to learn how to do this whole job search thing in 2010.

For some of them it’s been a long time since they searched for a job, 20 years or more.  They were under the impression that work would always be there, because it always had been.  In many ways they are teaching me something.  After all I’ve had 7 jobs in 20 years partly due to the uncertain nature of the industry I used to be in and partly due to the fact that I enjoy change.  So to think of working for 1 or 2 companies in twenty-thirty years is a bit befuddling to me.  Almost as befuddling as how to handle being laid off is to the group of job seekers that ask advice from me.  Fortunately for them, I have a great network of people I know.  And one of that network is Paul Geffen, who found himself in their shoes just over 1 year ago.  For the first time in his adult life he was not working…and his journey over the past year is helpful to learn from.

Here is the gist:

Get started - some people just need a bit of a nudge to start.  Or a sympathetic ear.  And understand if you start and are unhappy, adjust your approach, change something and you just might find your niche.

Network, network, network - and while you want that network to be made up of people from your industry, cast a wider net, you’ll get a richer experience.

Know your story - of course you know your story but can you communicate it well.  I’m not a fan of the word “pitch” because for me networking is more about getting to know someone and having a conversation with them about mutual topics, not “pitching” them per se.  But I know Paul and he is a great networker as well – he’s not always pitching…he’s often listening and honing what he will say so when that right person comes along – he’s ready for them.

Keep busy – it may not be making you money, but keeping busy will keep you networking, could help build your skill sets and even bring you to new skill sets.  Paul did not do community building in his last gig…but he’s gotten pretty good at it and might even want to pursue it for his next gig.

Be ready to be surprised – whether it’s that you are enjoying your freedom more than you thought or than you feel you should admit, or it’s that you actually may no longer need that income as much as you thought or you didn’t really enjoy what your were doing anyway, you’d rather try something else.  Being unemployed is a journey.  Don’t script it.  Be ready to take what comes and investigate new opportunities and skills which just may take you somewhere wonderful.

Now of course you need to update your resume and have that ready and you need to talk to friends and colleagues and let them know that you are looking and what you are looking for, but the above tips will help you weather the storm.  And maybe even learn something about more flexibility at home and at work.  Paul certainly has.