Don’t you hate it when you have a really great presentation, conversation, brainstorming session and then 20 minutes later you have an epiphany that would have been perfect if only you’d had it during the event?  Yeah, me too.  Yesterday in fact.

I was on a call with community managers through The Community Roundtable and we were discussing work/life.  I was giving them the knowledge I had learned over the years and through the research I’ve done for this site:

1) Have boundaries and stick to them

2) Manage expectations

3) You cannot have it all, all at once – you will need to say “no” to things

4) Ask for help

By all accounts the call went well and a good time was had by all and I learned a lot from them.  Afterward I was talking offline with one of the participants.  He is an expectant father and is nervous about how his life will be changing soon and how he will manage his work/life.   I told him that this would all actually become much easier…because as a parent you need to do all of the above…regularly.

There it was…the epiphany that has probably been rolling around in my head for a while but just simply couldn’t manage to come out at the opportune time.

Why has it been rolling around…well this is a daily routine with me:

1) Boundaries – while I like snuggling with my little one, I also like sleep.  My pre-schooler knows mommy & daddy’s room is off limits to kids before 7am unless you are sick/in need.  It’s a hard and fast rule.  And it works really well – with the help of a digital clock.

2) Expectations – “Mommy can I have a cookie?”  “Mommy can I have an ice cream?” “Mommy can I have that toy?” How many times a day, week, month, year do I hear this?  While I am asked constantly for these things she doesn’t get them consistently.  New toys come around birthdays & holidays, treats come sparingly each day.  That is what she now knows to expect.  It won’t stop her from asking but it stops her from having a meltdown each time she doesn’t get what she has asked for.

3) Say “no” – well based on the above I say “no” a lot.  But I also do it in a more positive way.  “Mommy can I have a cookie?” “Absolutely, once we have dinner.”  “Mommy can I have a new toy?” “Not right now, but let’s put it on your birthday list.”

4) Help – There is no way I could do all of this and stay sane without my nanny, weekend babysitter, husband, extended family.  I would simply be too stressed and dysfunctional.

What happens if I don’t use these 4 constantly?  Bedlam, unhappiness, stress, tears for all.

So why wouldn’t that be true for our adult selves as well?  It doesn’t matter if you’re a community manager or a business owner or a car mechanic.  It doesn’t matter if you use a smart phone or not.  It doesn’t matter if you’re 20, 30, 40 or 80.  This is what is needed.  And I’ll be the first to admit – I’m great at parenting a pre-schooler.  Not so much at parenting myself  – because it’s not fun…and I do want it all, NOW…and let’s be honest my parents would never let me stay up this late to write a blog post.

So show of hands…who wants to be my parent?

Last week I wrote a Worker’s Bill of Rights. And I’m sticking to it.  I think these are common sense rights that actually do not cost companies money but strengthen the employee/employer relationship, increase productivity and the bottom line.  To that end I think employees need to understand that while these rights may be “self-evident” they are not without obligations and responsibilities.

So here is the corporate side of things.  A pledge of allegiance to the company you are working for currently.  It is not one that is binding forever.  But if you are expecting them to treat you as an adult…you need to be an adult.  So here is what I propose the pledge to include:

We pledge to do our work well and turn it in on time

We pledge to act like adults when representing our employers

We pledge to be available when we say we will

We pledge to be flexible if we are needed extra now and then as they pledge to be flexible in slow times with giving us back some of that extra

We pledge not to abuse sick, vacation, disability policies

We pledge to work as members of a team, no matter where we physically work

We pledge to be productive employees that enhance the company’s bottom line

We pledge to discuss any complaints we may have with the company first before airing them out publicly

We pledge to treat other employees, customers, bosses as we would like to be treated

Simple enough, right?  That’s what I think.  Again feel free to add to this pledge, complain about it, berate it.  But let’s get the conversation going and hopefully we can get flexibility at work flowing!

This will be a rant…yep a real, honest to goodness, can’t stop myself, toddler temper tantrum rant.

Workers of the world unite!  Unite and get the sort of flexibility you want in the workplace.  That is the ONLY way it will happen.  That means all generations, all genders, all races, all religions, those with children, those without children, those with grandchildren, and so on, and so on and so on.  Stop separating yourselves to advance your particular agenda at the expense of the whole.

What on earth am I talking about?

Well let’s see, there are women who are being slighted constantly.  Older workers who need to start a revolution.  Families who just can’t make work work. Younger workers who are misunderstood.   Then there was this podcast series that separated everyone from moms to dads to Latinos to seniors to…well everyone.

There are movements and conferences and isms that continually pit workers against one another.  And you know what, it’s working…the corporate work world isn’t really changing…instead they’re watching workers duke it out with each other for more attention to their particular segment of the population.

I have an idea.  How about instead we talk about the similarities in what we all seek and we work together to make it happen?  I know…crazy…right? Here goes:

We the People of the World of Work, in Order to form a more perfect Workplace, establish Justice, insure business productivity and growth, provide for ourselves, promote the general Welfare, and secure the Blessings of Liberty to ourselves and our Posterity, do ordain and establish this Constitution for the World of Work.

Workers Bill of Rights:

Autonomy over our schedules – whether we work hourly or are on salary

Freedom to work where and how we want as long the job gets done

Right to be treated like the adults we are

Right to have outside interests and take time for those regardless of what time of day they occur

Ability to work at the level we’ve achieved and be compensated accordingly even if we work less than 40 hours/week

Right to receive raises, promotions, and bonuses based on the merit of our work instead of on the amount of face time put in at the office

Right to ask for more flexibility at work without being discriminated against

Right to work without discrimination when we have children, have reached retirement age, are just out of college, or need to care for sick loved ones

Right to fall ill and not be financially penalized or fear for our jobs

Right to take time off for ourselves that we have earned and not be categorized as “shirkers”

This is not dictatorship but a democracy so please feel free to propose your own amendments.  I don’t think these are unreasonable…but I do think that unless we ALL work together this World of Work Constitution and Workers Bill of Rights will never be realized.

There is a very good chance at some point in your career you will find yourself rejected by an employer for being too qualified.  Or you will be considered to be a flight risk for being part of the disgruntled underemployed.  Now I say there is a very good chance because people are underemployed for a reason, either financial or due to the need for more workplace flexibility:

• There is a recession on and they didn’t plan for a rainy day, or they did and that rainy day lasted a really long time
• They have a family member: parent, child, spouse, sibling that they need to and want to care for
• They have just left college and there are no jobs out there that they are qualified for…but at the same time, they are too qualified to simply answer the phone
• They have relocated due to their spouse’s job and can find no jobs in their field
• They are older and therefore going to be retiring at some point, so it’s just easier for workplaces to prevent the pain of having to replace them at a bad time for the company and instead eliminate their position and hire someone with more updated skills and train them

So in other words if you’re young, if you’re older, if you’re middle aged, if you’re a child of someone, if you’re a parent of someone, if you’re married or have a significant other you will find yourself in this conundrum.  Even if you work in HR…you will find yourself in this conundrum.  So we can look at surveys and we can make snap judgments and we can do what is always done, discriminate against these people in the workplace…or we could use more common sense than that.

Employers:

So you want to hire people who are engaged and who are going to stay with your company and you don’t believe the “under”employed fit into this model.  I would suggest trying these steps (as one who has been underemployed very happily, and also very crankily)

1) We’re all adults – yes that’s right your employees are adults…please treat them as such.  If they are over qualified it is quite possible they will do the work faster than others may.  Don’t punish them for this.  You have hired them for a job…not to fill a chair.  If they can do that job in 30 hours instead of 40…great!  Then they have more time to exercise, be with family, run errands, live life.  They will be happy, you will have your goals met…it’s a win/win.  But if you stand over their chair at work, log their hours mentally, get annoyed by their Facebook usage and other silly details, you will lose.

2) Pay for the skills you use.  How great, they have more skills that you can utilize as the company needs.  But you know what?  You’ve entered into a business arrangement with them to accomplish tasks that require specific skills.  If you’d like to use more of skills than you asked for previously, it’s time to amend the business arrangement and compensate them accordingly.

3) Communicate openly and honestly.  It’s okay to be concerned about an overqualified employee.  But it’s not okay not to talk to them about it and get more information.  So put it on the table – at the interview stage, once hired, and on a regular basis.  This isn’t a secret.  They are overqualified.  It should be discussed in a productive, adult way.  Find out if they are unhappy…and if so why.  See if it is something that can be fixed.   Of course, there is a chance it can’t be fixed…but there is also a chance it can.

Understand that at any point in time…part of your workforce is most likely considered “under”employed.  You can either fix it…or you can ignore it and hope it goes away.

Employees:

You may be smiling after that…but now it’s your turn.  You may not be smiling soon…

1)  You are an adult.  Yep, you are.  If you are given a task to do and it is “beneath” your capabilities…oh well,  you are in that situation for a reason.  It is a choice.  You can be an adult and do your work well and on-time and celebrate the extra time you have to live life.  Or you can fill a chair, complain to co-workers and family, and become disgruntled…your choice

2) Understand what you’re selling.  You may be asked to do more, give more to your employer as you are more qualified than for the job you are doing.  But think hard about how much you’re willing to give them extra…and whether you want to give it for free or not.  Employment is a business arrangement.  If you don’t like the arrangement you have it is up to you to take some responsibility for that and either re-negotiate or say “no.”

3) Communicate open and honestly.  So you have more skills than your employer needs.  Talk about it.  Why is that?  Why are you making the choice you are making?  What do you see as the challenges and rewards to this arrangement?  And check in regularly if things aren’t working quite right.  Do not suffer in silence…or everyone loses

Understand that you will find yourself in this position more than once in your career.  The responsibility is on you to manage it well.

This isn’t rocket science people…it’s life…it shouldn’t be this hard to live it happily!

There has been a lot to read on women and work lately.  Apparently we did it! but unfortunately we’re less happy.  And maybe gender bias in the workplace contributes to our unhappiness and maybe gender bias is really all women’s fault. And finally the one that started it all for me – whether the workplace will ever be able to be gender-blind.

As I was pondering these issues I was working on fitting in everything I’d like to accomplish personally and professionally.  And I was bummed about a blog radio show in the HR space that I’d like to listen and participate on.  I was bummed because the broadcast was at 8:30p at night.  So I commented on twitter that I was befuddled why Human Resources radio shows were on at bedtime…many of us in HR are moms and are in the middle of putting kids to bed and can’t participate.

Then it happened.  I got a response from a colleague in HR who is a Dad and of course has a conflict as well with the timing of the show.  It stopped me cold.  Here I was pondering gender bias in the workplace and I had just contributed to it!  He was, of course right…I was of course wrong.

I’ve spent a lot of time thinking about why that happened.  And I honestly still have no idea.  It’s not due to my background…my Mom worked 3-4 nights a week as a nurse growing up while Dad handled dinner and bedtime those nights.   It’s not because I have a neanderthal for a husband…when he’s not traveling for work he loves doing bedtime.  In fact he’ll re-arrange his schedule so I can work as needed on those radio shows.  So I don’t know why it happened.  But I do think it’s telling.  If I am guilty of gender bias…then many other perfectly nice, thinking, evolved people are as well – and probably aren’t consciously aware of it.

Uggghhh!  So what to do?  I’m not sure but I’m not willing to throw my hands in the air and give up.  I’m going to try a few things:

Be more self-aware and thoughtful about it.  Now that I’ve made that mistake once I will do my best not to repeat it.

Stop using the phrases “working mother” or “working women” – it separates women from men in the workplace.  No one ever uses “working father” or “working men.”   Now this one may be hard to overcome.  After all there are magazines, conferences, career coaches and books that make money off “working mother” & “working women.”   The day either we stop using these phrases or we start using the male-oriented ones as well will be the day gender bias at work is on its way out.

Don’t encourage it.  Today I will be unsubscribing from Forbes Woman.  Forbes is a business magazine…so what is Forbes Woman?  I asked them, point blank.  And they explained that Forbes doesn’t cover issues about women and business well so they started Forbes Woman.  Well in my opinion…they should probably cover all aspects of business or rename their original publication Forbes Men…let’s not be hiding our biases with “separate but equal” bullsh**.

Don’t make a big deal out of it.  Yes, I know this article would suggest I think it’s a big deal.  In fact I think it might go away if we all just considered ourselves workers and concentrated on getting our work done while being treated fairly.  I don’t need to make exactly the same amount of money as any other c0-worker makes.  I need to be happy with my salary, the way I’m treated and the work I’m doing.  And if all that is true…what’s the problem?

And here is where I think it all comes together.  If we just focus on what we need and what we want and stop comparing, contrasting, competing…perhaps work-life happiness will come.  I read this great tribute to a grandmother last night.  She worked, she raised a family, she managed a house, she had a very tough life and she was happy.  Isn’t living well the best revenge…so let’s just concentrate on our own happiness and the rest should take care of itself.

Right?

After a great weekend in New York and a really fun, informative, idea-filled day at the Social Recruiting Summit on Monday I’m still processing many of the conversations I had and sessions I saw.

In two sessions, one led by Carmen Hudson and one led by Susan Burns, attendees were asked to think about recruiting from the job seekers perspective.  For me this is really easy, as I’ve never been a recruiter…but have often been a job seeker.  After 20 years and 8 employers, I consider myself pretty well versed in the act of job-seeking, both passive and active.

So I offered my two cents to some of the attendees.  And it was greeted with a look as if I was from Mars.  My take was that while career sites are great…it’s not where I turn to to get a job.  Here is how I did it and what I believe many others do, as well:

Job 1 – fresh out of college, in a recession no jobs to be found (sound familiar).  So I started temping.  The temp agency knew I was looking for a permanent position, they knew my skills, they shopped me around while I was in a temporary position.  It took them 5 months, but they found me a full-time gig.

Job 2 – a friend had told me her company was hiring and she thought I’d be a good fit.  I was sort of over the entry-level work I was doing and wanted to move up but wasn’t sure.  Then I walked into work where they had some financial pressures happening and the phones didn’t work…because they hadn’t paid the phone bill.  I went downstairs to the cafeteria and used the pay phone (yep, I’m that old) to call my friend to tell her I was interested in more info.  I was interviewed and offered a job within the week.

Job 3 – A former colleague from job 1 was hired as the operations manager at a new TV Station and I heard about it.  I had been working at an ad agency and was ready to go back to TV world.  I gave him a call.  He told me to fax him my resume.  I did.  I was interviewed and hired.

Job 4 – After an amazing 5 years of growth and development at the TV station – the owners sold it – and laid off almost the entire staff, me included.  I took the summer off to consider my options, while keeping in touch with friends.  One of those friends got a contract to produce college hockey games.  He hired me to be a freelance producer along side him on the games.

Job 5 – I had always wanted to work on the Olympics and they were coming up again.  I contacted Mike Eruzione who had been the color commentator on the college hockey games I had been producing.  He was involved in the olympics for years and gave me introductions.  His contacts could not help me, but they put me in touch with the people in charge of the TV production for the games in Salt Lake City.  Before a ski trip to Utah, I contacted the head of production for the TV people, told him I would be in town and could I have an informational interview.  They agreed and asked that I bring my resume.  My informational interview was on day 1 of my ski vacation…an offer was extended on day 4 of my ski vacation.

Job 6 – I took some time off after the olympics to travel the world with my husband.  But we stay connected via email/internet with our friends and family.  I had also put all my information on a “keep in touch” list of people who worked on the Olympics.  While overseas I got an email from an olympic colleague who was now working in media relations for the Sundance Film Festival.  She needed workers during the festival and knew that coincided with my return.  I signed on.

Job 7 – I was returning home to Boston and not sure what I wanted to do next…but knew it was not in TV.  And suddenly I had a mortgage to pay for the first time.  For years my husband and I had participated in a great 2-day charity bike event that rode from Boston to Provincetown.  I emailed the head of the event dept. (who I had met several times) about the fact that I was returning home and would like to work for them because they put on such great events.  She had an opening to fill.  I was interviewed and got the job.

Job 8 – The non-profit I had been working for decided to cut down on its events and I had less and less to do.  As I was also one to donate to this charity it didn’t make sense for me to stay on.  So I went back to temping…to figure out my next move.  The temp agency placed me in a marketing manager role for a local company.  After 2 months on the job they and I wanted to make it more permanent…and we all did.

I am now on Job 9 which is this website.  Obviously no resume was needed to get me here.  Many of  the situations above required a resume at some point.  But not all.  And sending a resume was never the entry point into that company.  Nor was it the biggest consideration from the person doing the hiring on whether or not to hire me.  So while I wasn’t surprised to see that recruiters still think the best way for a candidate to get a job at their company was by uploading a resume on their career portal.  I was a bit disappointed.  And I personally think that’s not how many job seekers (passive & active) end up getting their jobs.

I also thought this was a great way to illustrate how recruiting has always been social.  That’s my experience.  Social media is just a new tool in the recruiter’s and job seeker’s arsenals to reach out as the telephone, email, fax machine and networking have been in the past.

What do you think?  Am I from Mars?

First let’s define “you.”  You are someone who currently works, or is taking time off but may want to enter the work world again, or is actively looking for work, or someone whose job it is to find people to work for your company or simply someone who has friends involved in any of these activities.  So I think “you” is pretty much everyone.

Now what is “Social Recruiting?”  It’s a way companies are currently sourcing active (current job seekers) and passive (not currently looking for work) candidates to work for their organizations often using the internet.  Through social activities.

So some could say social recruiting has been around for a very long time, long before the internet.  Haven’t people always been looking to find the right fit for themselves or their company?  Haven’t they talked at cocktail parties, association events, high school reunions, the local coffee shop, and even sometimes at the water cooler about openings at their firms…or about the job they wish they could find.  Hasn’t recruiting often been social?

So why does bringing that to the next level confuse and scare so many?  Honestly the difference now is that instead of your high school reunion…you can talk about it on Facebook with people located all over the country.  Instead of talking at an association event, you can go on to the discussion board at the associations website and talk to not just local members in person, but all members via the internet.  Instead of being face-to-face with someone at a cocktail party…you can talk on Twitter with millions of others about almost any subject.

That’s right…it’s the activities many of us have already been doing to find or fill job openings only with exponential numbers attached.

I happen to be a “you” so here is some of my real world experience with social recruiting:

The job seeker

I have a friend who has been working in an industry that the recession has simply decimated.  Not only is business not good, the rules surrounding it have changed forever and made that industry much less attractive and lucrative.  My friend is looking to go back to his former industry…which he left 8 years ago.  So his resume may not be his best approach.  And at his level job boards probably aren’t going to do it for him.  So what is he doing?  He’s scouring the niche job boards.  Once he finds a company that may interest him, he goes to LinkedIn to find out who he knows working at that company.  He reaches out to them to get more information.  He then goes to the company’s career site and starts asking questions (because this company allows you to ask questions of employees currently working there about the culture, etc.).  He is sure to insert into the conversations some of the accomplishments he had in the past.  A conversation begins.  Meanwhile he’s using Facebook to gage what his friends know about and think about the company and he starts following that company on Twitter – on it’s various Twitter accounts – for jobs, news, and product updates.    He is simply using internet to help him network to find a job…much like we all used to do in person.  When the time is right, he will pick up the telephone, meet with someone in person, do what we’ve all done for years.  It is all the same…just a little different.

The job filler

Recruiters are sales people.  They are selling their companies.  So they go to the association events, the fundraisers, to visit the schools where the smart kids in their industry are emerging.  They’ve been doing this for years.  Now they get to do it from their office first.  Again they can post jobs on niche job boards, have discussions on association websites, let their friends and colleagues know through Facebook, Twitter and Linked In what jobs are available.  They can encourage candidates to reach out to them via any of these.  If they find someone they are interested in, they can engage in an online discussion first. They can get referrals, they can even have hiring managers “talk” to the candidates.  Again at the right time a phone call is made, a meeting is set up and most likely a resume is looked at.  But that no longer needs to be the first step.

For the person who’s happily working but has an active mind

While you may not be aware of it, you are looking for your next job.  As your interests and life changes you join groups, make friends, have conversations that change and evolve with you.  And your job evolves, colleagues move on, your work ebbs and flows and at some point you realize you’re just not as happy as you used to be.  Maybe, for you, as for me work/life balance becomes an issue.  But you are good to go.  You’ve been part of associations in your industry.  You read articles and blogs online, maybe you’ve even commented on some of them.   You spend your weekends with like-minded people and have even connected with them online so when you can’t see them in person you can keep up with their lives.  Some of these people work at companies that have openings…they think you’re a good fit…they let you know about an opening, they let HR know about you…and a conversation begins…again without a resume.

This is social recruiting.  This is why you should care.

I’m heading to the Social Recruiting Summit for recruiters and vendors in the recruiting industry next week.  You’ll see much more from me on this topic soon.  I just didn’t want you to think it would not be of interest to you.

Related articles:

Social Recruiting and Your Job Search

Top 10 Social Sites for Finding a Job

WTF is Social Recruiting?

Social recruiting grows popular among recruiters

I recently read an article in the work/life space about a couple of opposing views on the work/life struggle.  My comment on the post was:

“Great post. Isn’t transition hard? And it’s what we are all going through. Transition from 1 working parent to 2 working parent families, transition from having to leave work at work to being plugged in all the time…or not, the middle place where we find ourselves taking care of parents and children simultaneously when all we want to do is take care of ourselves, transition from placing so much emphasis on career to determine who we are to wanting more time at home.  It will get easier…we will figure it out..I am sure of it.”

This is how I felt also at last week’s Kennedy Information/OnRec recruiting conference.  We are all going through so many transitions:  Is HR dead or dying? Are workers ready to leave once the recession is over and what can be done about it?  Do people come to conferences anymore or do they just watch the streaming sessions and twitter stream?  Where the heck can I plug my laptop and Iphone in so I can also get some work done?

And the conference clearly is in flux.  Both in terms of what attendees want and how conferences can deliver it.  Some attendees want to attend a session, hear from “experts,” take some notes, go back to the office and act on ideas.  But some attendees (and more and more of them in my opinion) want to debate the topics, hash it out with really smart people and be part of the discussion and then continue the discussion at lunch, at dinner, at parties into the night.

I happen to be in the latter group.  And for me this conference was a disappoinment.

There were some great sessions:

• Joel Cheesman moderating a panel on why mobile recruiting is a no brainer with real life examples from companies like AT&T, Yahoo! and KFC.
• Eric Winegardner of Monster.com’s session on How to hire a Keeper – which was interactive and had the audience participating and debating and was NOT a sales pitch for Monster in any way.
• Don Ramer talking about Aribita’s recruiting Genome project and how HR & recruiting need to morph…to woo candidates and be more values oriented.
• And the only “unconference” moment where a panel was put together from the audience after a speaker was a no show.  The positive was how people came together quickly and put great content out…the negative (for the conference organizers) was that it came from the audience, not the organizers.

These represented 3 great hours of programming…in two days.   On the whole I thought the conference and it’s content was pretty mediocre:

• Many sessions talked about subjects that have been presented before, some for years, without adding anything new.  And most of these sessions talked at the audience and seemed to be more about the presenter than about the audience.
• There were too many vendors who had speaking slots.  Please don’t sell to me.  I am happy to go by your booth and hear your pitch if I’m interested in your product.  Don’t trap me in the 3rd row for 40 minutes in a presentation that sounded interesting in the abstract but in fact is a sales pitch.  Content is king…and attendees can differentiate between great content and a sales pitch easily.  And in the world of social media, your session will be outed as such, quickly.
• Good ideas need time to discuss.  40 minute sessions are not long enough.  I know the merging of the two shows caused some logistical problems and I’m sure the session times were part of this…but every session felt very rushed and left little interactive time at the end.
• I want to network…not for 20 minutes but for longer periods of time.  We had a great long lunch hour…but not one place where everyone was eating.  In fact it was really hard to find someplace to sit with a table to be able to cut your roast beef or turkey – which was what was served both days for lunch.  My lunch hours were not productive because I spent too much time trying to find people.
• Does water really cost that much more than really bad lemonade and iced tea?  I know times are tough…and full disclosure I was a guest of the conference and did not pay for my pass.  But I needed to leave the convention center to get a water or soda and it was a hike.
• It was hard to stay plugged in….literally.  Electricity was few and far between and in a world of blackberry’s, iphones and laptops how much would it cost to have a few power strips that have 4 or 5 outlets to plug in to?  And reliable wifi…it is nice to have free wifi at a show and I did appreciate that.  But it was spotty and difficult to use.

Much of the best part of my Chicago experience had little or nothing to do with the conference.  It involved things that were not officially conference hosted like:

• Carmen Hudson launching Tweetajob. Her enthusiasm and energy and smile should be bottled and sold.
• The tremendous Fail Spectaculary party hosted by Laurie Ruettimann and Jason Seiden.
• The great people who attended the show and debated, discussed, dined and had drinks with me.

If you’re on twitter and would like to check out the reviews of other twits check out the #onrec09 stream.  It tells the story.

Tomorrow is the last day to enter Recruitingblogs.com “My Future in Recruiting” contest.  So in typical me fashion…I entered…just before deadline.  Would I like a trip for 2 to Mexico?  Sure.  But more importantly I think HR and Recruiting are doing a great job of evaluating themselves and the changing workforce during this recession.  I also think if you’re interested in the discussion…you should jump in.  “Listening” is definitely necessary but talking is as well and it’s nice to see so many discussing this subject in a substantive way.

Some of the great articles I’ve read recently that influenced my answer include:

Candidate Experience: UR DOIN IT WRONG by Punk Rock HR

Interviews Are the 3rd (Really 9th) Best Way to Select People by The Staffing Advisor

Talent Camp And The Possibilities For HR By Rehaul by Lance

How to Go from Small to Super By Harvard

My Future in Recruiting…Share your’s and win a vacation! By I’m So Corporate

Google Gives HR Something New To Worry About By John Zappe on ERE.net

And for another opportunity to discuss the future don’t miss tomorrow’s HR Happy Hour radio show…it’s not about the future of recruiting but HR…and it should be a great discussion.

I first came across Jason Seiden thanks to this great article “Screw Your Career Path, Live Your Story.“  I found it to be smart and informative and an idea not often thought of…many just go along with the status quo…this was turning the status quo on its ear.  He continues that tradition here.  After my appearance on HR Happy Hour Jason tweeted: “@leanneclc Great points on #HRHappyHour yesterday. My take: To chase balance is to chase mediocrity.”  I was intrigued.  I’d been talking about this concept for over a year, was I chasing mediocrity?  The more I thought about it…the more I thought he had a point.  If everything is in equilibrium and nothing is challenging you or pushing you forward…perhaps that is mediocrity…and I certainly do my best work when challenged.  I asked Jason to clarify…he did…I’d love to hear what you think:

Work/life balance? Ha! That’s a funny one. (And don’t let’s pretend like changing the phrase to “work/life choices” makes the idea any less hilarious!)

Why is this phrase so funny? Because there is no such thing as work/life balance, and no such thing as a work/life choice—that’s why.  To believe that there is either is to perpetuate intellectual dishonesty; to make either the foundation for career decisions is to ensure mediocrity in life.

Let me repeat that: to strive for work/life balance is to ensure mediocrity in life. That’s not a joke, by the way. I’m not being funny, ironic, sarcastic, or witty here. I’m dead serious: work/life balance is a juvenile, incomplete, ill-constructed doctrine. Which is why when I speak about How to Self-Destruct, “work/life balance” is my lead-off.

For starters, the language of work/life anything guarantees failure. “Work/life?” With a slash? As if these two things are discrete items that can be weighed against one another? Excuse me?!

“Life” is all encompassing. It includes everything from my first breath to my last, maybe more. Which makes me wonder: if life is everything, then what the hell is this “work” thing that we’ve separated out from it? If there is a work/life choice what could work possibly be that I’d choose it over life?! These semantics subtly and profoundly frame our impression of work in the negative, and describing our world in this way guarantees a certain amount of stress.

You know what else guarantees stress? The extreme language we use to describe a lack of “balance.” Is your schedule “insane”? Is your client work “blowing up” this week? Are you “crazy busy”? Does your boss “drive you nuts” with all those last minute requests? Do you really think it’s possible to find balance in a world in which scheduling challenges make you “insane,” “crazy,” or “nuts”? Here’s a clue: no. It’s not. Not even if you had all the Calgon in the world could you escape that sort of intensity.

(Think I’m making too big a deal of semantics? Remember the story of Tower of Babel, which God put an end to not by robbing men of their architectural abilities, but by making it difficult for them to communicate with one another. Language matters.)

And then there is how people implement “work/life balance”—whatever the hell that means. I particularly love the exercise of looking at the 168 hours in a week and figuring out where to spend them all.

“OK now… I want to sleep 7 hours a night… that’s 49 hours down… then there’s commuting time, meals, workouts, entertainment, meetings, phone calls…” Pretty soon, you realize that Peter Gibbons from Office Space was right: when you look at the world that way, you really can only get about 15 minutes of real, actual work done in a week.

There is no such thing as a balanced day. Or a balanced week. Sometimes, whole months—or even years—are spent focused on singular pursuits. The idea is to surround yourself with your passions (even better, cultivate your passions from out of what you currently do!) so that wherever you are, it’s someplace you like being. When you surround yourself with passion, you can make each day what it needs to be for you to be successful.

Balance is something that happens over the long term. It is an outcome of always being surrounded by passion. And it is has to do with managing the tension across all the subplots of your life… not just one of them. Balance is not something to shoot for day-to-day.

Strive for passion, achieve balance. Strive for balance, achieve… jack squat.

So, when it comes to work, do you really want “balance”? The “choice” is yours.

Jason Seiden is the author of How to Self-Destruct: Making the Least of What’s Left of Your Career and Super Staying Power: What You Need to Become Valuable & Resilient at Work. His recipe for career success is simple: screw your “career path,” live your story.